We have all been conditioned to feel as if we are either lucky or unlucky in love, but I personally believe that luck has nothing to do with how our relationships turn out. Nor, most likely, does love have much to do with what we call romantic encounters either!
What’s love got to do with it?
The reason I say that luck has nothing to do with our love life is because I believe that we make choices in the physical and non-physical realms. These choices determine how we experience reality in our physical or incarnated lifetimes here on Earth. Every relationship is a mirror for our inner state and is a gift as such, because it can show us (if we accept it as a reflection) where we are on our personal path of self-growth and evolution.
Self love is key!
How many of us have learned to fully love and embrace ourselves? It is a commonplace truism to say that “we cannot love another if we don’t fully love ourselves”. But what does that really mean? If I constantly attract people into my life as romantic partners who are selfish, immature, narcissistic, who have problems with addiction, financial independence, controlling their temper, or any issue that might bring chaos or disrespect into a relationship, do I ask myself where I am lacking love and respect for myself in my own life?
What are soul contracts?
I believe that before we are born (decide to come to Earth or some other planet and live in a lower density physical vehicle that we call a body), our soul and its soul group and guides get together to create a life plan. The soul is immortal and has lived an uncountable number of lifetimes, just for the fun, suffering, and multitude of experiences that incarnations have to offer. We are not limited in our identity to our gender, race, appearance, sexual orientation, that our body offers in this single lifetime.
The soul group decides upon and seals a certain number of agreements that we choose to experience in this lifetime. There is still some free will involved, and how we respond to each encounter and situation will determine how our lifetime unfolds. Relationships are included in these soul contracts. These include our parents, siblings, relatives, coworkers, friends, and romantic partners and spouses.
What is a “bad” relationship?
In human terms, we don’t like to suffer. We want to be happy. Happiness generally means getting our way, from a human perspective. The ego always wants what it wants, and it does NOT want to suffer. The soul begs to differ. The soul does not judge anyone or anything. There is no such thing as a good or bad relationship from a soul’s perspective. Every experience, every relationship is an opportunity to love self and others more, and to gain more mastery over self – thoughts, emotions, intentions, and choice making abilities.
From our human point-of-view, a bad relationship is one in which we have been abandoned, or where our needs have not been met. It is a relationship where we feel alone, or where we are abused or feel afraid. Yet do we ever ask ourselves why we ever agreed to be with a person who makes us feel less than loved and respected?
The answer to these questions is simple. No one can make us do or experience anything that we do not agree to experience. If we are hurt or choose to live in fear or with abuse and disrespect, it is because we don’t yet love and respect self fully. And that’s OK. It’s a learning curve, and “bad” relationships are our best teachers.
Say thank-you and move on!
Once I realize that I create my own reality and that I am an empowered immortal being of light, any relationship on the human plane takes on a different aspect. Now that I know I am a sovereign creator and artist of my own reality at any given moment, I constantly remind myself how amazing it is to be alive. I am so grateful for all experiences, and I am learning constantly how to be thankful when unpleasant people, triggering experiences, and frustration come along.
This isn’t easy for any of us, but it wasn’t meant to be easy!
Once the realization seeps deep down into the fabric of our being, we finally wake up and think, “Wow! I can actually experience anything I want, if only I can truly love and respect myself and all that is!”