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painted word…a poem


African rock art ladies

an ache in my heart erases the glimmer of trust

which once lit my eyes

peeling the perspective of each day

one an invitation

two a threat

three a choice

a thoughtful reordering of the words

that organize my head

and so I encounter humanity

a checkerboard of sharply contrasted thinking

so many actions without nuance

or a heart-manufactured understanding

The female chimp’s wisdom

searches for fleas and lice

where she senses the potential for violence

While the human shades her eyes

with stripes of denial and opinions

Beliefs carry us out to treacherous oceans

separating us from the wit and web

of the universal we

Is human experience intended for peace and understanding?

I navigate this school with trepidation

and the frustration of physical maintenance

logistics

entropy

While my heart and the picture well of my soul

yearn for the freedom of embodiment to dream

pictures into words

excitement fires the engine

of my heart

reseeds wonder into the tepid

PTSD of my trust-rusted wariness

What is worth my time?

Am I a worthy warrior in pursuit

of the creation of betterment?

Why not settle my worried flesh

and bones into the variation

of experience?

Settle my hand on the contented

countenance of a canine snout

and relax into the unfolding

story of my being

without predetermination’s need

to control the shape and outcome

of me, existence, and its purpose?

In a world where ordinary being

not close to enough

I will settle for the cracked open

perfection point that is me with you

you within me

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